So, uh, want to help me take my top off?

[bodlon]

This is an awkward post to write, so I hope you'll bear with me and read it through to the end.

I'm thirty-one. I help support my disabled mother, who lives in the downstairs unit of my duplex, which needs a new roof this year (and which my roommate and I are working on financing in more traditional ways). My day job pays for as much of this as it can, my writing pays for as much of the rest of it as I can manage, and the rest is occasionally terrifying.

Typical artist scenario, really.

I'm also a Female-to-Male transgender man. I've been out and living as male full-time since 2006, and have been on testosterone for a few years. My insurance doesn't cover my transition at all (save that my hormones are in their formulary, so I pay $7 a couple of times a month instead of $20-30), so all of the medical end of my transition -- endocrinology and surgery -- has to come out of pocket.

Chest masculinization surgery -- aka "top surgery" as it's more commonly called -- is expensive. The alternative, which I've been doing since I came out, is binding my chest using a strong spandex tank-top called a binder. A binder smooths things out, and then I can layer with outerwear, but it also limits my range of movement and compresses my ribs and trunk. Uncomfortable is putting it mildly, but I'm well endowed enough in this particular area that going without really isn't an option.

About a week ago, I had really excellent opportunity to have top surgery basically appear out of nowhere. The surgeon is local, he's knowledgeable and kind, and he thinks I'm a good candidate for surgery. This is, frankly, amazing news.

The trouble is, this surgery costs about $9200, which is nearly fourteen of my regular paychecks. My financing options are limited right now -- fixing the roof is likely to tap out my ability to really take on debt -- but if I can raise at least $6k, my surgeon is willing to work out some financing options with me. The more I can scrape together, though, the better.

If this wasn't a really fantastic opportunity, or if I could do it all by myself, I wouldn't be writing this. It is, though, and I know lots of us have offered contributions for this kind of thing for other folks in this position. My goal is to have the funds by October 31st so that I can schedule surgery before the end of the year (when operating room and anesthesia costs will rise again).

So. Here's how you can help me make this happen:

- Share this link with folks who might be willing to assist. I'm not shy about my trans status, and I'm a writer, so my identity isn't a secret. Shouting from rooftops (using appropriate safety apparatus) is perfectly okay.

- Plain old donations via PayPal. Does what it says on the tin, and you'll have my gratitude all the same. Anyone who donates at least $30 should share their mailing address with me so that I can send something special (probably a Hold Something-style story or other shiny object) once I've met my goal.

So yeah! PayPal button. Gotta love the PayPal button.

- Buy (and if you like it, recommend) my short story, "Finished" (which previously appeared in the now out-of-print LGBTQ issue of Crossed Genres) at Smashwords. It's a story about someone a bit like me, if I also happened to be an intergalactic art thief who can fight like Jason Statham. It's only 99 cents, and I'm quite proud of it.

- Bid on my eBay auctions. I'm harvesting books and other various things from my boxes and shelves, and will have new items up roughly every week. Shipping is via USPS Priority Mail, so this is really mostly only works well if you're in the US.

This post has been mirrored from Christian A. Young's Dimlight Archive. To see it in its original format, visit dimlightarchive.com

Comments

[pocketmouse]

*vibrates*
I just got a text from a friend saying he's leaving his job next month and I'm #1 on his rec list to have his job. If I get it, I won't need the 2.4k I've been saving towards for the children's theatre. If I get his job, or if I don't but somehow the children's theatre gets a grant and I don't need the money I've saved, I will gleefully give you a large chunk of it.

Frustratingly, if neither of the above happens, I currently don't have enough money to live on through August.

So that's why I'm not jumping to beat everyone else to the clicky button. Since your goal is the end of October, I'll definitely know well before then how much I can give, but I also don't want to wait longer than I have to to donate. So I'm promising you now at least $50, but I might not be able to donate until October. But that way you can factor in that amount.

[bodlon]

One, you're awesome.

Two, tell me if you need me to send you care packages of food.

Three, the birthday thing? I have run afoul of backordering. It's ridic. ARGH. Hopefully you will get it before a thousand years from now.

[pocketmouse]

1. Dude, I'm restraining myself from immediately just shoving the credit card I've nearly paid off at you. I should wait and see how much others offer before I do that. I can't believe how excited I am for you.

2. I will probably be all right even if things stay status quo -- it's just no one has sent out their overhire calls for next fiscal year yet, so I don't have much work lined up yet, but I'm sure that will change. I just can't schedule money right now.

3. Backorder is fine! Backorder is tracked down, and it means I don't have to be suspicious of our very nice postal worker.

[bodlon]

1. Restraint is good.

2. I can get really good deals on things like pasta/rice sides, and tend to hoard non-perishables anyway. So. Do not be troubled if things are slim. Random edibles are a Priority Mail Flat Rate Box away.

3. Be kind to USPS. They are like librarians in their secret masterness.

[pocketmouse]

2. I also have a roommate who shares all her food ever, so I think food-wise I'm good. Really, if I don't get enough work I'll just be dipping into my savings, which I try not to do as I don't have a real retirement plan.

3. The postmistress is very nice! I'm just also waiting on a paycheck that I was told was in the mail 2 weeks ago. I am pursuing that with the employer, so hopefully that's all that is too.

[settiai]

2. pocketmouse also has a roommate who works in a restaurant and has no qualms about flirting with the cooks to get free food. (See? The job does have its good points. Not many, but some.)

[bodlon]

Devious!

(Also, flirting is less of a requirement and more of a fringe benefit in this plan. Heh.)

[lefaym]

Will signal boost. :)

Will donate too, but I might have to do that a few paychecks down the road.

[bodlon]

Thanks for the boost! And since I'll likely be trying to raise this for a couple of months, a delay is totally fine. Honestly, I'm humbled just to be boosted and wished well!

[contrarywise]

Dude! That is totally awesome!! I'm not in a position right now to click the Donate button or send a check, but the moment I am, I'll send you what I can. Definitely by October, almost certainly well before then.

[bodlon]

*hug*

The good wishes are excellent, and totally sufficient, sir. I won't say no, but I also know your circumstances are tricky and prefer you housed and fed, yes?

[contrarywise]

*hugs back at'cha*
Yes, my circumstances are sub-optimal these days, but I promise I will not send you what I cannot truly spare.

[bodlon]

This works for me. Yes-yes.

Good luck!

[ysabetwordsmith]

I have linked to this. I hope it works out for you.

Re: Good luck!

[bodlon]

Thanks so much!

[chryssalys]

Here via lefaym's signal boost - just bid on the dyes on ebay (my lady will love them if I win!), and will definitely look into if I can swing a donation. It's awesome that you found a surgeon who is willing to work with you on this.

[bodlon]

Thanks! And if you win more than one of the dyes, we can work out the shipping thing and knock off a couple of bucks if you like.

[chryssalys]

Eh. Or we can add it to the fund. :)

[bodlon]

This also works! Just let me know what you prefer if you win them and we'll go from there.

[chryssalys]

So - just bid on the yarn also. So if/when I get the dye, can you hang on to them for a couple days til we see if I get the yarn as well? That way, it can all go in one box, save you postage, and add more to the surgery fund. :)

[bodlon]

Sure thing! I'll write down your eBay handle so that I know to watch for you.

[chryssalys]

And I've won the dyes (will pay shortly) and am keeping an eye on the yarn. :)

[bodlon]

Excellent! I'll hold onto them until such time as we see how the yarn does, and we'll figure out shipping then. :)

[chryssalys]

Got the yarn, have paid, looking forward to the box with it and the dye. My lady's birthday is coming up, and although she knows I bid on them, I'm hoping she's forgotten so I can surprise her with them. :)

Add whatever is left from the shipping costs to the fund, 'kay?

[bodlon]

Will do! I've got everything packed, so I should be able to get stuff in the post tomorrow.

Here's hoping she likes the yarn and the dyes!

[moonvoice]

I've given some, and only wish I could donate more (though I might be able to, given your deadline)! It's a crime that surgeries like this cost so much money. :(

[bodlon]

*hug* You rock so hard. Thank you!

(Also, I keep meaning to comment about the sketches. Chickens!!!)

[gone_fishing]

I made a small donation. I don't have a lot in my Paypal right now but I signal-boosted and will try to donate again between now and then.

Good luck! *fist pump*

[bodlon]

Thanks so much! I appreciate it.

[keieeeye]

ahhhh I wish I could esp since I was talking about wanting top surgery today, but, you know, earthquakes, winter, lots of uncertainty, I just cannot spare any money. I will link on twitter though and hopefully something will come of that.

[bodlon]

I appreciate the boost. And yeah, NZ? Kind of needs help rather than to give.

Keep safe and warm and poke me if there are things I can do in my hemisphere (in addition to my usual regular small donations to the RC and such), yeah?

[saunterleftside]

Hey dude, here via copperbadge @ lj. Donated a little something. I really hope you make your deadline. Best of luck!

[bodlon]

I appreciate the help. Thank you!

[stasia]

Here via Copperbadge. I'm on your Hold Something list, but with a different email address than the one I use for paypal. I don't know how big that list is, so I don't know if you can cross check them. I don't care about Special Somethings (as it happens, I got a lovely extra book from you with interesting short stories, including one by you, when I wasn't expecting it because I didn't know you did the monthly drawings - it was a wonderful surprise!).

Your writing is evocative and compelling and I hope this works out for you!

*zen hugs*

Stasia

[bodlon]

It's hard for me to match up separate e-mail addresses, but I recognized your name on the notification e-mail. I suspect it has something to do with hand-writing all those envelopes every month. ;)

I'm glad you like HS, and I'm incredibly grateful for your donation! Fingers crossed, yes?

And if something interesting should happen to show up in the post when all of this is over, perhaps we could simply call it a victory lap? :)

[stasia]

Yes, let's definitely keep fingers (toes, eyes, legs, nostrils) crossed for luck.

And, well, it occurs to me that I have your return address, so if something interesting (by way of a victory lap) turns up, I can return the favor and send you something interesting as well. I'll have to keep reading to find out what you'll regard as interesting!

*grin*

Stasia

[girlpearl]

Going to sound like a bit of a schill here, sorry...

So, one, congratulations, I hope this works out for you! I will definitely be back to donate when I'm not on my phone :)

One option you may have for financing is a company called Care Credit. They do financing for medical, dental, veterinary & I think ophthalmologic care. Depending on the amount financed, they offer various repayment plans with 3 to 12 months interest-free.

Drawbacks: not all docs take it, you need have not-horrifying credit to be approved, and once the promo period is over the interest is, well, criminal. But it might do to fill a gap if you can't raise the full amount.

[bodlon]

I'm familiar with Care Credit, but I'm not sure they'll take me. My ex-partner was un/underemployed for a couple of incredibly ill-timed years after I bought the house, and that did some pretty significant harm, financially. While things are more stable than they used to be, I'm still finding old debts here and there, and my overall debt load isn't ideal.

Plus, I'm trying to save what load I can sustain for the roof, if and when we can find a bank willing to take that chance.

Still, once I get close to my goal, I may give them a try anyway. Their rates are a lot better than my bare minimum alternative (a company specializing in medical loans for people with poor credit), and if I can get lucky with a small loan with a good company, I'll pay less overall.

Thanks for the good thoughts!

[braidedmane.livejournal.com]

I really hope this works out for you! I too have been really enjoying your Hold Something stories (my boyfriend gave me the weirdest look when the last one came and I clapped my hands with glee), so I would be excited to see a new story as the "special thing" once you meet your goal. In the meantime I'mma get my hands on "Finished," yay new story to read! And share this link with folks that might be able to help.

[braidedmane.livejournal.com]

Ooh also, I guess I should probably let you know I came by from Copperbadge too :D. Though I suspect you'll get a lot of that!

~Kelsi

[bodlon]

Had a couple of comments go astray -- this one included! -- and am only replying now. Sorry about that!

I hope you like (liked? still like?) "Finished," and thank you for spreading the word! Fingers crossed. :)

[thestarglass]

No problem, journal comments can be tricksy things :)

I did like it! I haven't gotten a chance to review it on Smashwords yet, but I really enjoyed it.

(This is still braidedmane, but for some reason I can't seem to use my OpenID login)

[bodlon]

No worries! And ah yes. Logins! Lots of them! It happens.

[thette]

I'm also here from copperbadge, and I love your Hold Something envelopes every month. (I'm probably your one and only Swedish subscriber.) Unlike a lot of others, I'm not strapped for cash, so I'm going to donate right away.

[bodlon]

Ah! And of course this got sorted into the wrong folder and I didn't see it to reply...

You are indeed my only Swedish subscriber! I always wonder if my accent marks look completely ridiculous because they're not marks/letters I use in English and so I'm just happily copying them as faithfully as I can. ;)

(Also, thank you! So very much!)